41.) I did, but they used too much mayo-neighs! Where do you find a horse with no legs?Where you left him. Which side of a horse has more hair? Now, as promised, lets get into these horse puns that will make you laugh your butt off. A: Its pasture your bedtime. Why did the pony get sent home from school? You'll stirrup a hayload of fun for all your friends and family. 3. What did the horse say after it fell? A horse-pital! 2.) What do young horses wrap their food in. Related:How to Be Funny The Definitive Guide. We promise not to say anything too foal! "Excuse me, good sir," the horse says, "are you hiring?" The manager looks the horse up and down and says, "Sorry, pal. Because they grew up in a stable household! Q: What do horses see before thunder? His life coach told him to get off his high horse. So 24 hours pass with the senator joining a group of contented souls moving from cloud to cloud playing the harp and singing. 35 Horse Puns Funny Horse Puns from parade.com. Share it with us in the comments below! 71.) Why dont horses want to be left behind? So saddle up, and enjoy the bouncy ride. What kind of horse can swim underwater?A seahorse. Three weeks later, a horse walked up to him carrying the Bible in its mouth. iHeartHorses.com is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to Amazon.com. Why would the circus need a bartender?. multiple-meaning words, However, that doesn't mean that us equine enthusiasts don't like to laugh from time to time. A horse was euthanised following a fall in the third race on the final day of the Aintree Festival. He thought he might get a kick out of it! Because pepper water makes them sneeze. So if your child is in need of a belly laugh or two, read on and prepare to be . 47.) Where do newly married horses sleep?In the bridle suite. It gives you a bunch of short horse jokes for kids that you can use at home with the family or on those long car journeys. Knock knock knock knock. A child who needs a good laugh? Did you hear about Cinderellas horse?Once upony time. A. It said horse-shoo fly dont bother me. Domesticated, or tamed, horses can live in almost any habitat, but wild horses prefer plains, prairies, and steppes for many reasons. Dont! He got knocked off his high horse. A 19th century horse named 'Old Billy' is said to have lived 62 years. Here are 75 funny moose jokes and the best moose puns to crack you up. They will always take offense! He de-neighed all accusations. 75.) Every Tuesday at 6:50 and 8:20 we read your best or worst Dad Jokes! Find out the funny answer in today's jokes! Horses have around 205 bones in their skeleton. The hostess said hey. Read More 45 Funny Minecraft JokesContinue. He rides all day and starts to nod off in the saddle when he notices he is about to ride straight over a cliff. Q: How much money did the rodeo bronco have? 43.) A. Haha just kidding, they get shot. Perfect for kids! Who is in charge of horse town?The mare (mayor). Horses require tons of care. Almost all wild horses are feral horses that are descended . A: The other half! A: To get to the bale of hay. Do you have any funny horse jokes that we forgot to include? A Kanye West documentary is heading to Netflix and Cardi B is. What fruit do twins love. Why should people never be rude to jump jockeys? At this point, a fed up racehorse pokes his head round the corner and says Youre both pathetic, Ive won ninety-nine of my last hundred races, and only lost one because I was ill. Horses are herbivores (plant eaters). 17. Q: How do you know when a horse has a negative attitude? Ahorsewas arrested and brought to the police station for questioning. Required fields are marked *, You need to agree with the terms to proceed. 77.) 2.When you hear gossip about a horse, you are basically listening to a neigh-sayer. CTRL + SPACE for auto-complete. Every time her friend started looking, shed run right pasture! Q: What do every horse and rider do together? Here are 65 funny horse jokes and the best horse puns to crack you up. 39.) Did you hear about the man who was hospitalized because he swallowed six plastic horses?The doctor described his condition as stable. It got colt feet! Youll never find a horse using an Android phone.They only like Apples. These 35 horse puns will make you whinny and neigh while you clutch your sides. I was nervous at first, but she promised me it wasn't a colt. A: He thought it would make it softer to ride on. What does it mean when you find a horseshoe? Want more animal jokes? So, why not encourage your childs love of joke-telling, and make it an educational experience at the same time?! These elephant jokes will get you a ton of laughs! A: Horse radishes. Did you hear what happened to the best horse racer of all time? The best horse jokes will have an unexpected twist or reveal at the end of a bit longer joke typically set up in the beginning. Because he was a little hoarse. 29.) Shows. The doctor said: Its OK, youre just a little horse.A jockey is walking down the road leading a racehorse when he bumps into a friend. These boys were some of the nicest kids and would never say a dirty joke. 82.) Well, let it be known that horse jokes aren't just for kids anymore! What did the horse say after she fell over. 69.) 3. As you may know,punsare a type of wordplay involving two meanings of the same word, often created for comedic effect. Ive fallen and I cant giddy-up. Submit your best joke here and get $25 if Readers Digest runs it. From puppies in the park to the bunny rabbits that dominate the most beloved storybooks, many of the first words children learn are the names of animals from the cat in the house to the giraffe far, far away. The pastor explains, to make the horse go, you gotta yell, Thank God! And to make it stop, yell, Hallelujah. The cowboy rides off. 55.) 12.) 49.) For your entertainment, we've compiled a list of cowboy one liner jokes. Best. Q: How do you hire a horse? Q: Where do horses stay at night when they travel? (coarse) G-Horse - The pull of horses on you. If you're enjoying these horse jokes, you might like our popular article 17 OF Our Favorite Equestrian Memes. Do you love all things punny? (A Critical Review). Q. That is because most jokes are play-on-words, or they are funny because a word in the joke might have two meanings, or the word could be a homonym. A: Horse doeuvres. We should name him Neigh-palm! Itll give you a night-mare! 96.) Did you find a pun that could be your next great dad joke? Horses, the flawless, majestic beasts whose hoofbeats match the beats of your heart, whose flowy manes remind you of your warmest dreams, with noble eyes that peer right into your soul. What is a horses favorite television show? Q: How slow was the race horse? A: Neighbraska. One of the boys says Hey you want to hear this dirty joke. Where Do Horses Live? What is the difference between a horse and a duck?One goes quack and the other goes quick! Why did the horse talk while his mouth was full? 62.) There wont be a single tail of whoa; simply the most hilarious horse jokes. Although the awkward dad joke silence must have been ringing in your ears, we hope you found a horse pun or two that you can use the next time you go to the stables. Horses can sleep both lying down and standing up. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. 78.) A pony goes to the doctor and tells him, Doc, I think Im dying. Where do horses live. Heres a collection of hilarious horse jokes for kids with puns that you and your family can enjoy. Here weve compiled a list of some of our favorite horse jokes one liners. Two racehorses are in a stable. The horse replied, You read my mind!, A horse walked into a therapists office looking upset. A horse walks into work looking very sad. No chance of a touchdown there. Q: How do you save a horse possessed by an evil spirit? He had to ask me how to pronounce my neigh-me. These horse jokes for kids are fun and enjoyable for everyone. In domestic situations, horses may be confined to a stall or a yard for part (or even most!) A Desperado rides into town and downs a few drinks at the saloon. The stubborn teacher snorted and said, It would be-hoof you to pay attention.. The first dog says Ive won six of my last ten races. Why did the horse get an award?It was out standing in its field.How was the horse after the accident?In a stable condition.What do you call a horse thats a world traveler?A globe-trotter!Why did the foal go to the doctors?He was a little hoarse.What animal can you always rely on?Horses, cause their always stabled!What kind of vacuum cleaner do horses prefer?A Hoofer.Whats the quickest way to send a horse mail?Using the Pony Express.A man rode his horse to town on Friday. A neigh-bour. Weve compiled a list of the funniest horse jokes for kids for you to have fun with your son or daughter. 36.) Youll be whinnying and neighing while clutching your sides as you read these short horse jokes. 13.) A: Can I get you a stable. A guy is walking through the country when he spots a sign that reads, Talking Horse for Sale. Intrigued, he walks up to the stable to check it out. These horse jokes are especially great for parents, horse lovers, teachers, cowboys, ranchers and farmers but they are fun for everyone who enjoys cowboys, rodeo and horses. Do you know what happened to the man that tried to wash the horses mane? 79.) Because these jokes are true barnburners, this piece is guaranteed to become a mane-stay in your library of comic bookmarks. What is the best type of story to tell a runaway horse?A tale of WHOA! What do you call a horse with two legs?A horse without two legs. The barman confuses idioms with jokes and offers him a glass of water, but can't make him drink. The stubborn teacher snorted and said, "It would be-hoof you to pay attention." Never search for clean Halloween jokes again Download them now instead. Financially stable! Answer: The horses shadow. What do you do when your coworker asks you to stop making horse jokes? Whos there?Quiet horse. Whats the hardest thing about learning to ride a horse? Why are most horses in shape?Because they are on a stable diet. Great for parties, events, cards and trick-or-treating. What makes a horse sneeze? Have you heard of the neigh-metal band, The Foals? The horse might stirrup some trouble! A horse walks into a bar. A: He liked being a herd animal. With jokes about paso finos and ponies, these jokes are sure to bring a smile to your face. See, it's hard to pin down what makes Bargatze funny, but whatever it is, it's all in that six-minute story. A: He was going to stirrup some interest. A horse sits down in a movie theater and the woman next to him asks, Excuse me are you a horse?, The horse says, I really liked the book.. The ending comes into equestrian! A: Fast food restaurants. How can this be? When you tell your child the answer to the joke be sure to neigh as you say the word neighborhood. Q. Well, let it be known that horse jokes arent just for kids anymore! Do you have a favorite joke about horses? You don't have to be an equestrian to get a good chuckle from these jokes. What do you call a pony with a sore throat?A little hoarse. A horse sits down in a movie theater, and the woman next to him asks, Excuse me are you a horse?, The horse says, I really liked the book.. 50.) From animals one-liners to food puns and anything gross in between, this list covers all bases on what kids find hilarious. Australian Brumby inhabits open grassy plains but is also found in semi-arid desert regions. Hey says the barman. . She swears her neighbor is in a colt! What is a horse's favourite sport? When you spend all of your time, energy, and money on horses, you need a good sense of humor. Horses that have been tamed usually live to be around 25 years old. Because they cant achieve full horse power without gas. What are you planning to do with that nag? the man asks. Whats the difference between a horse and the weather?One reigns up and one rains down! 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